Hey guys! Okay first Im gonna crank out all the general news I have to share:
First of all, you guys can make your emails as long as you want, because sis Kunkel and I print them out in the morning so that we dont waste computer time reading them. Also, thanks so much for the package! So great to get stuff from yall....and thanks Claire for the cookies! Anyway, those socks that you sent are fantabulous and really helping me with my feet. They still hurt really bad in multiple places, but I mean the doctor said that I didn't have any lasting damage, so I guess just lots of ibuprofen is the way to go. He said he could do a custom insert for about 300 dollars...but I don't want ya'll to spend that much money when I don't even know how much it would help. Also, Sister Mildenhall, guess what?! I went and gave Sister Nally a big huge hug for you. When you told me to keep an eye for her, I didn't realize she was the mission President's wife! haha I was kinda scared to go up to her, but she was so sweet and friendly. She seriously seemed like a clone of Carollyn. Also, as the new Sister Training leaders, we get of list of all the incoming missionaries in our zone. Guess who will be in my zone? TYLER MOLINARO. How cool is that? Get ready for an awesome time Tyler. Can't wait to see you :) Guess who else I see ALL the time? My dearly beloved cousin Bresia. Yeah, she is two doors down from my residence room. How cool is that? I see her every night and we talk all the time while we brush our teeth and get ready for bed. I even got to sit by her in choir practice. What a blessing. I am so happy to be able to see her often and we can support one another. That's what this life is all about: supporting one another.
Speaking of which, I have a cool story about that very idea:
So, this week has been a bit rougher than the others. You definitely have ups and downs as a missionary, which any RM can understand. I started to get really discouraged and felt totally inadequate as a missionary. I began to doubt that I was good enough to qualify for the Spirit because of my pride and my huge inadequacies. I just kind of gave up on myself and it was a horrible feeling, because all I want right now is to be a good missionary. The thought of not fulfilling that purpose is devastating and so many missionaries go through it. Anyway, I wasn't myself at all and was way stressed, but I didnt really realize it. Luckily my teacher did and called me out of the class to talk to me. When she asked if everything ws okay, I just started crying (I know right? I don't cry very much in front of people) and told her how inadequate and unworthy I felt. She made me look her in the eye and tell her if I was trying my best to be a good missionary, which I replied yes to. Then, she said, "then you already are one", and I realized then that it was true. God doesn't want perfection, because we are all imperfect. We are only perfected in and through Him. All He wants is a sincere desire and a willingness to do as He asks. Then He can fill in the gaps, which I have many of those. My teacher also read us the talk "His Grace is Sufficient" which EVERYONE should read if they are feeling down on themselves. Then she told me to research the Gift of the Holy Ghost, so I did.
Here's the cool part. I had all these great scripture written down about the qualifying, inspiring power of the Holy Ghost from my research and I was feeling great, but then guess what. Sister Kiunkel started getting down on herself in the same way I had and I could see exactly what was happening. Luckily, I had all of these scripture that I could just whip right out. Even more, I could testify to her that the Atonement is real for all of us, because I had JUST experienced it's power for myself. Those scriptures really worked for sis Kunkel (Moses chapter 6 is the best) and soon we were both able to teach and plan by the Spirit again. I know Heavenly Father directed my teacher to have me research the Holy Ghost so that I could then help my companion. You see, we are all here to take care of one another, and God has a hand in it all.
When we are feeling down on ourselves, we don't necessarily forsake God. We just think we are unworthy of Him because of this or that. It's as if we think He somehow doesn't know that we are worse than He thinks or something. But you see, Christ has ALREADY suffered all of our shortcomings and pains. He ALREADY knows it all and He understands. He wants us to be perfected through Him, not on our own. He is waiting for us and we are the ones pulling away. All we have to do is trust God and have faith. If we don't think He can save and fulfill and qualify us, then we are calling God a liar, and then we may as well not believe in Him in the first place.
The Holy Ghost is the Comforter. It can fill us with the love of God, and give us answers if we are willing to listen. If we truly and humbly desire inspiration, we are ALL worthy to receive it, imperfect and flawed as we may be. Remember that repentance is a gift, not a condemnation. It lets us leave our shortcomings behind and step forward into a fresh new day. Yes, we will repeat mistakes. God knows this. But when we repent, we have a DESIRE to not repeat our mistakes. We have a desire to be better. If we let Christ change us, He will truly turn us into masterpieces, but we have to trust that we deserve it first, which we all do. Life is beautiful. People are beautiful. We are all worthy of love. I know that God will pour it upon us if we will only let Him.
Oh, one more thing on the topic of repentance. Watch the Mormon messages Youtube video called "Reclaimed". It's awesome. Watch it.
Okay I love you all sooooo much. I love hearing from you, and youre in my prayers. Keep in touch!
Sister Huntington
